settle in kids because I am about to tell a story about a guy very near and dear to my Heart. A man who should be revered, and laughed at all at the same time. This guys Name is Joey. Joey is from Jersey and has hunger for adventure. He has the coordination of a drunk 6 year old, but boy does he love to send it. Joey tried skateboarding but all the skater kids called him a poser, he tried BMX but he didn’t know how to ride a bike. Joey was lost. He knew he wanted to send it and feel that rush but he could not find the right facet to do so. Then his dad booked a family ski trip and Joey thought this could be his saving grace. He rolled up to the hill with his jeans on, some rear entry boots, 150 Head rentals, and an exposed forehead ready to send and the rest is history.
Since that day thousands of other people just like Joey have hit the slopes all over the world. They all have a similar lack of style and coordination but that doesn’t stop the send. Joey’s often get made fun of a lot because they ski in jeans and tuck with their hands on their knees. But we all secretly love Joeys because they go full send and don’t give a fuck what the looks like. So Joeys should be treated with at least a little bit of respect. You can make fun of them all you want but at least have the courtesy to remember their motherfucking name. These joe bags spend all day goin full send and getting horrible debilitating injuries on the hill and you ignant fuck giraffes out west can’t even seem to remember his name. I am disgusted and honestly kinda confused cus calling him Jerry is just fucking stupid. First of all have you idiots ever even seen friends? Second you don’t even have the classic nicknames Like: Joe Bag, Joe, Josiah, Joerannosaurus Rex. What are you gonna call Jerry? Big air Jer? ok that’s actually sick but it doesn’t matter because his name isn’t fucking Jerry. So if any of you fuckgiraffes have any sort of respect or dignity, you’ll start calling him Joey.
What is most disgusting to me is that now the word Jerry is spreading to the east coast and even infecting our youth. I spent 2 chair rides arguing with a 9 year old girl I coach because I heard her say Jerry. Needless to say I smoked her stupid ass. But it’s just sad to see our youth be corrupted by horrible people like the founder of jerry of the day. We need to teach our youth to respect Joeys while still chirping them from the lift after eating shit on sheerboom like an idiot. We can make fun of Joey because thats just what happens when you look like an idiot skiing. But give him the respect of remembering his name. #FuckYouJerry
Gnarstool Sports 